মেঘ কে ...

তোর বুকেতে  আগুন  আছে  বলে

মাতাল  আমি  উথালপাথাল  হই ..

তোর  সুবাসে  মহুল  ফুলের নেশা 

শিশির ভেজা  বকুল, পারুল, জুই  ...

তোর  সুরেতে  মেঘমল্লার  রাগ 

হঠাত  পাওয়া  হারানো  ছেলেবেলা 

তোর  আদরে  অবুঝ  পাগল  মন 

বৃষ্টি  মেঘের  লুকোচুরি  খেলা |

তোর  কাছেতে  আমার  সারা  আকাশ 

আমার  বাতাস, মাটিও  দিলাম  তুলে ..

তবুও  কেন  হোসনা  খুশি তুই ?

তবুও  কেন   থাকিস  আমায়  ভুলে ?

বল  দেখি  তুই  মেঘ  দেখেছিস  কোনো ?

মেঘের  কোলে মস্ত  সে  এক  বাড়ি ?

সেই  যেখানে   যক্ষ  আমার  থাকে ,

শ্বেতবলাকায়   মেঘদূত  দেয়  পাড়ি.

বল  দেখি  তুই  কার  কাছে  যাই  আমি ?

কার  কাছেতে  করব  যত  নালিশ ?

আমার  কাছে  আছিস  কেবল  তুই ...

তুই - ই  নাহয়  আমার  কথা  শুনিস  |

আজকে  আমি  বহুদিনের  পরে 

সঙ্গোপনে  তোকেই  শুধু  বলি ,

ক্যানভাসে  তোর  ময়নাপাড়ার  মাঠে 

 দাড়িয়ে   আছি  বৃষ্টিভেজা , তোরই  কৃষ্ণকলি  ||

My Painting

ক্যালাইডোস্কোপ

মেঘনা , তোর আকাশপারে  ঘর
তাই  এপার  ওপার  দুই  পারেতেই  চর ;
মেঘনা , তোর  আকাশগঙ্গা  দেহ ,
তোর  বুকেতে  উথালপাথাল  ঢেউ ...
তোর  পাড়েতে অনেক  সাধের  বাসা ,
ছুটির  দিনে  মাদল  তোলে বোল;
মেঘনা , আমার  অবুঝ  ছেলেবেলা ,
চু -কিত- কিত  ঠাকুরমার  ওই  ঝুলি ;
ওপারেতে  বাউল  সুরে  গান ,
শীতের  দিনে  মিষ্টি  পিঠে  পুলি ..
মেঘনা , তোর  কুটনো কোটা  হাত ..
চল  পুকুর  থেকে  শালুক  তুলে  আনি;
দুপুর  রোদে  পুকুরে  দিয়ে  ডুব ..
আরশি  দিদির  ভোকাট্টা  ঘুড়ি,
শরতকালে  কাশের  বুকে  দোল ..
আকাশনীলে  মেঘের  লুকোচুরি ,
মেঘনা , আমার  মায়ের  বুকে  করাত,
সবাই  বলে  বানভাসি  বানভাসি ..
তবুও  আমি  বাংলায়  গান  গাই ,
বাংলায়  কথা  বলতে  ভালোবাসি ||

ভ্রমণ

একছুটে রোদ্দুর  পেরলেই  রামধনু  পাওয়া  যায়  যদি ..
আমি  হাজারবার  বৃষ্টি  হতে  রাজি  আছি ..
বৃষ্টি  হয়ে  তোমার  উঠোনের  অনেক  আল্পনা  হয়ে
স্বপ্ন  বুনতেও   রাজি  আছি  যদি  একবার  তুমি  বল ..
একবার  বললেই  আমি  শালপাতা  থেকে  টুপটাপ
ঘাস  থেকে  ঘাসে  হীরে  হয়ে
সাজিয়ে  রাখতে  পারি  অসংখ্য  প্রদীপ ..
অথবা  চাঁদের  পাহাড়  থেকে  ঝরনা  হয়ে  নামতে  পারি
শালুক  এর  ঠোঁটে  লেগে  থাকা  একটুকরো   হাসির  মত ..
একবার  তুমি  বল  -- আমি  মেঘ  থেকে  মেঘে ,
মেঘপাহাড় এর   বুকে  খেলতে  রাজি  আছি  অজস্র  লুকোচুরি;
কখনো  টাপুর  টুপুর , কখনো  রিমঝিম  সুর  তুলে
হারাতে  রাজি  আছি  সাত  সমুদ্দুর  তেরো  নদীর  পারে
যেখানে  কাগজের  নৌকো  ছুট  ছুট  ছুট ...
একছুটে  পারি  দেয়  সবুজ  ছেলেবেলা ...
একবার  বল  তুমি ..
আমি  সাতটা  আকাশ  পাড়ী দিয়ে  বৈঠা  ধরা  মাঝির  গলায়
গান  হয়ে  ভেসে  যেতে  রাজি  আছি  পদ্মা  নদীর  পারে ..
তারপর  ঝড়ো হাওয়া, বকুল , পারুলের  পথ  পেরিয়ে
স্বপ্নের  মত  নীল , নীলাকাশ ..
রাইকিশোরীর  কাঁখে  চড়ে একছুটে  পুকুরের  ঘাট ---
তারপর  মাছরাঙ্গা হয়ে  পাড়ি দিতে  রাজি  আছি  অনন্ত  নিরুদ্দেশে
-- শুধু  তুমি  যদি  একবার  বল  ||

A homage to the source of life...on His 150 th Birthday

It was on the night of the 29^th May, 97 years ago, when He spent a sleepless night thinking about drafting a letter  to be written to Lord Chelmsford, the Viceroy , repudiating his Knighthood in protest for Jalianwallahbagh mass killing.  He was seething inside with sublime agony as none of the political leaders were raising their voice against this heinous crime.

On another such night on the 29^th May of this year(2010), I experienced the same pain as Him when I heard the news of a massive train accident which took place just 20 km from my home town. It was (a kind of) sabotage, done in order to satisfy some political issues (for details please see http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/world/south_asia/10178967.stm).  I am an ordinary person. The Prime Minister of India will not read my letter. So, I have no way to get even a little solace (of mind) like Him.  I could only spend helpless, sleepless nights and scream with several nightmares.

Its true that all over the world, homicide is becoming a common issue and we all are getting used to it until and unless our land is safe, our family is safe. Being an ordinary, a very ordinary person, I had sympathy for people who were affected due to the 9/11 attack. But it was not a sleepless night. It never came into my nightmare. Simply because there are 12 hours’ time gap between world trade centre and my home place.

We often forget the ratio of terrorists to peaceful citizens is 1:some exponential order of 10 (at least of 6^th order). It is amazing isn’t it? That In spite of having a poor population ratio the terrorists have the upper hand! It is true that, terrorists are unpardonable. But we are equally sinful because of our own negligence. Our endurance of terrorism is the only reason for the domination of this inhumanity over humanity. Only sympathy, only impulsion is not sufficient to resolve the problem.

Today when I see that the violence is gobbling up my town, my country even the whole world.. I wonder  how He could have used His fence against inhumanity, against terrorism  if He would have been alive today. He is the one who made me trust on mankind saying that it is a sin to loose faith on mankind. I was probably in class 2 or 3 when the war between Iraq and Kuwait took place. Everyday the picture occupying the 1st page of newspaper, showing blood, death, injured or dead child  created a panic inside me as being a child I was too sensitive to bear with those assaults. My mother who is my best friend, explained me His words that, it is a sin to loose faith on humanity and since then I am believing it deep inside my heart in spite of being in the age of violence, in the age of abomination, in the age of betrayal. He is the sun without which life can't survive. Perhaps, that is why he is Rabindranath Tagore, an example of a humankind characterized by own name.  His poems, his songs are not only for making a world of fantasy with moonlight, nature and love but also each of them makes one realized about meaning of life, about thinking beyond isolation. His letter to British Govt.  refusing Knighthood offered by them to protest  Jalianwallahbag mass killing (for details see http://calcuttaweb.com/about/people/rabindranath-tagore/tagore-letter-to-viceroy) , his effort to start the festival of Rakshabandhan in Bengal in order to stop the division of  the state which was proposed  in 1905,  shows us the way to fight for right without any guns, supporting the principle of M.K. Gandhi who was renamed by Him as 'Mahatma' (The Great Soul). His only weapon was his deep trust on humanity which made him so strong to bear with the agony of separation of his near and dear ones...his sons, wife, daughters one after another in his last age . Solitude was never able to stop this legendary person from his creativity. When his youngest son Shamindranath died, he was returning from Hajaribag after the funeral rituals by train and saw the beauty of forest flooded by moonlight from the train window and realised that there is nothing less in the universe. life is far beyond death..it is just a recycle of being alive and being dead, a transformation of soul. He wrote one of his famous song 'Aj jyotshna rat e sobai geche bone/ basanter ei matal samirone' (today everyone has gone to enjoy the beauty of forest  in the moonlight night when the air of spring is  as imbibed as it can be. But I will not go. Because, I have to wake up for his arrival, I have to clean up my house although I do not know when will he  come) from which anyone will get the message of languishment of a lady who is far away from her beau. But which is in fact a song of realisation of the transformation of life from the stage of being alive to being dead. What can be he called as? A philosopher, a patriot, a person of romanticism or a revolutionist? He, with his creation is so magnificent that he touches each and every moment of us... from sorrow to joy, from isolation to unity, from finite to infinity. Today at the eve of his 150th Birthday (9th May, 2010 according to English calender), we can show a true tribute from core of our heart only if we say his words to the God 'I am bowing infront of you as i have insulted myself being selfish, isolated in order to glorify me. Make my ego engulfed in my tears. Please forgive me and  bless me so that I will not show off  my work , make me feel that I am just serving you in order to fulfill your desires. I need the ultimate peace provided by you and want to hold your elegance inside my heart. Please give me a space in the lotus of your heart and hide me there from being myself ' (a translation of 'Amar matha nato kore dao he tomar...') and feel it deep inside our heart.  We have to overcome our aloofness, have to hold our hands , have to love ourselves have to keep trust on mankind to make this universe free from all betrayals, all agony and it is the time to trust mankind right now from each individual. Because, once we are at the edge of our life,each of us want to convey the message to our friends and family that 'the cup of your heart will not be filled up with tears instead with the drink of my sweet recollection. I have come alone and have to go alone as well from this earth. It is only the deeds of mine which will remain, will cherish you every moment and thus I will be alive forever inside your heart. ' (translation from 'Bhora thak smritisudhai hridoyer patrokhani..')

bugs bugs..everywhere!!!

I am struggling with bugs in my FORTRAN program for last 2 months. My supervisor says there is always two more bugs  left after one finds out a bug in a program! But that doesn't matter much in comparison to the struggle I am doing with bed bugs!!! Yes, bed bugs in Germany!!! Fortunately(or unfortunately?) I didn't recognize these bugs for last three months as I never met with them. I have met  with scorpion, spider, mosquitoes, snakes almost daily in my home..but no..not with the bed bugs!!! In fact was having an allergic feeling for few months and stopped eating my favorite eggs, prawns and brinjals(eggplants) as they are all allergic food. Even stopped taking tap water and started to take mineral water following one of my friend's advice! But still was having the allergic sensation. I was sleeping happily and peacefully taking my allergy granted! May be now I can understand how much it is justified when people call me as lady Kumbhakarna (one should read Ramayana, the Indian epic, to know the significance of this name) who have seen me to fall asleep within 5 minutes. So, it was fortunate until and unless my sleeping was assured.

I have seen the insects in my bed but naturally didn't bother much just like we don't bother if we see some insects in rainy season or during diwali which come near light or fire in our home. Its just few weeks ago..I discovered blood spot on my bed cover. I started to think what might be the reason as there is no mosquitoes here. Thank to my story book reading habit! I have read somewhere in one of the Byomkesh Bakshi series (yes, the famous detective series written by Sharadindu Chatterjee) that bugs take blood from human body. So, started a wise(!) search through google images and yes!!! have found the similarities with the one I have seen before in my house :-) Now what should I tell it? its fortunate or unfortunate? My inner Kumbhakarna allowed me to sleep peacefully taking the allergy sensation as granted but alas! it is not allowing losing of blood as granted anymore!!!  It took away my three nights' sleeping :-(. Our student secretary in the university told me to go to pharmacy and to ask them to find a proper insecticide to kill them. I went. But guess what ??? Asians like Indians, Pakistanis, Sreelankans , Bangladeshis are easily markable. Not only that, in the western countries people think all the terrible creatures can be found in these countries and also in African countries. The shop keeper looked at me so suspiciously! She asked me thrice whether I live in Germany, took my address, asked my name and occupation. As if, she is going to report to the Health Ministry that some of the Indian has brought bed bugs from India  and left it in their country. Grrrrrrrrr, there should be a limit of stupidity. On the internet, it is clearly said that bed bugs are very common in Europe, North and South America. So, didn't waste my time there and found something on the net paying 30 euro (5 litre!) to kill 'bettwanzen', the German name of   'bedbugs'. That 5 litre container is finished and thinking to order another one( Because, my supervisor was damm true! there is always two more bugs left after I find out one!).Till then wish me luck friends to win the battle against bugs!!! :-(

বর্ষাশেষে ...

ঝড়কে  আসতে  বলেছিলি   আমার  সাথে  উড়তে  চেয়ে ..আমি  বৃষ্টি  হয়ে  এসেছি  তোর  কাছে ..
তারপর  কত  নদনদী  আর  তেপান্তর  এর  মাঠ  পেরিয়ে , কখন  যেন  হারিয়ে  গিয়েছি  তোর  সাথে ..
মেঘমল্লার  হয়ে , তোর  সুরে  তোর  ভালোলাগায় ...কখন  যেন  ভুলতে  বসেছি  বৃষ্টিবিন্দুর  জলতরঙ্গকে ..
আমার  সারাটা  বছর  থেকে  একে  একে  বিদায়  নিয়েছে  শীত  গ্রীষ্ম  বসন্ত  ঋতুরা...
শুধু  এক  বর্ষাঋতুতেই    বানভাসি  হয়ে  গেছে  আমার  বছর ,বুঝতেও  পারিনি  আমি ..
তাই  হঠাত  কালবৈশাখীতে  মেঘে  মেঘে  যখন  আঁধার ঘনিয়ে  এলো , মনে  পড়ে গেল ..
তুই  ঝড়  এর  মাঝে  আমায়  নিয়ে  উড়তে  চেয়েছিলি ...
ঝড়  এর  পরে  ভাঙ্গা  ডানার  পাখি আর   খামখেয়ালী  ঝরা  পাতার  পথ  ধরে  সে  উড়ান  বুঝি  কবেই  থেমে  গেছে ...
টুকরো  টুকরো  শিশিরভেজা  মণিমুক্তোগুলো  ভোগের  অনুপযুক্ত  বলে  মোহনাতে  ভেসে  যায় ..
বহুবর্ষণে   ক্লান্ত  বৃষ্টি  মেঘ  কে  দিয়েছে  ছুটি ..বানভাসি  বছরের  আকাশে  আজ  তাই  শারদ  আগমনী ...

Valentine's day Vs. Love

It was the time when I didn't know even what is Valentine's Day. But I never felt I need to be loved by someone. Because I was already loved by so many. My parents, my sister, my friends they all loved(still love) me so much that I never felt that, I need to know the meaning of this day. It was the movie 'Dil to Pagal Hai' probably which introduced this day to teenagers' like us. I was born and brought up in a calm and quiet small township which has both the facilities of village and town. Specially my house was in such a location that village was 10 mins distance in cycle and town is also in the same distance. This town was full of scenic beauty, its full of Sal trees(scientific name Soria Robusta) and so known as queen of forest in West Bengal. I remember my schooldays. I had read 'Aronyak' written by Bibhutibhushan Bandapadhyay which is my favorite book till now and I was so much in love with forest after reading it. Because, this is the book which 1st taught me forest is not only a scenic beauty but also it has its own character. It has its pleasure, it has its own sorrow.  My friends used to call me crazy as I  used to go in the deep forest by cycling to feel it. Being a girl of 14 or 15 yrs I was never afraid about the people who may harm me in those remote and unknown places instead I used to observe  their lifestyle. They would had been thought me also a bit strange as they never had seen a girl to come in those remote places alone just to observe the surrounding. Sometimes, one of my friends Ushasi used to give me company  as she was also little bit crazy. But after she left the town I was all alone to observe the beauty, to feel its character....characterized by its tribal villagers. Soon, I became non-stranger to them and they used to ask me whether me and my family were fine. They were poor but they were rich by their heart with full of love even so rich that being  in a wealthy country now I can understand how much people might be jealous of their assets here. I am sure that they also didn't know, even still don't know when they are dying, what is Valentine's day. Yes, my homeland is now in great danger. It is under serious maoists' activity. Its time to disclose to the reader that,  my homeland is Jhargram.  St. Valentine who died because of making a couple happy, has become a big icon for selling love..its time to sell dreams, desires and even emotions. Let's come back to the point of the poor villagers of my homeland. Its true that,they were deprived for decades and that is the only reason why they supported Maoists' initially. But alas! probably they didn't know that Maoists have taken chance of their deprivations, they have given them promises that they will make revolutions and they will remove their poverty which was never the motivation of revolution instead the only motivation is to get a separate state, few more ministerships. That is, the whole story of motivation is the story of game of power. Now, there the gun rules!!! 'come and join us otherwise u'll be killed' or 'If u r in the Maoists' group u'll be fired'. A dangerous tug of war between Maoists and Police force! Where the tug is made of people's life and miseries of common people have no importance!!! There are more than 100 villages around the township of Jhargram and these villagers used to sell fuel woods, handicrafts or vegetables from their fields and the only communication between local market and these villages is bus. Nowadays the whole bus communication is stopped because of cutting the roads or blocking the roads by big Sal trees. More than 5,000 Sal trees have been cut during last 2 yrs for this purpose!!! It sounds pathetic to me that my green town is no more green now. So, the villagers can't sell their products and they have no food for at least one time daily. Is it a life? I still remember the enthusiastic smile on those children's face when their mom  came back home with some food for them at the end of the day.  To get rid of deprivation it is needed to defeat the ruling party so that they can get the Govt. funds to make the necessary developments of those people and to do it they need support of people which can't be done by gun but by the heart.  If they truly  love people they should do something which will benefit people and then people will support them spontaneously.   Few days back, I have seen a news occupyling a little area of the newspaper. A police constable is teaching the villagers how to make handicrafts from Jute and then taking their products he is selling it in the market and distributing the money equally among all of them. If he can make such a big effort to establish this co-operative organisation then why can't we? He did it by his inner instinct as he loved his fellow people very much. So, at the end it is all about the 'Love' which can make change in our lives. We do not need a Valentine's day for it instead we need having a pure heart. We are so much interested to celebrate valentine's day because we are so much in crisis of love. A person never screams asking 'water' if he already has it!   So, let's love, let's hold hands and live our life friends!!!

জন্মান্তর

এইসব  নদী ,গাছ  এইসব  অমৃতময়  জ্যোত্স্না  চরাচর 

তোমার  মুখচ্ছবি  দেখবে  বলে  নিশুতি  নিশীথে ..

তোমার  বুকের  কাছে  চুপ  করে  অপেক্ষমান ...

রাত্রির  ঠোঁট  থেকে  সব  কালো  শুষে   নিয়ে  তোমাকে  আলো  দেবে  বলে ..

তবুও  তো  রজনী  অনন্ত  প্রবহমান , জন্মলগ্নের  গর্ভাশয়  যেমন  অন্ধকার ..

একটুখানি  আলো  ফেরি  করবে  বলে  তোমার  কাছে , তোমার  ঘাটে চুপচাপ  এসে বসে  আর

দেখে  গোধুলির  কনে  দেখা  আলোয়  দোলখাওয়া নৌকোটাকে...

অন্ধকারের  বুকে  টুপটাপ  জ্বলে  ওঠে  আলোর  তারারা ..

তোমার  কাঁধে  মাথা  রেখে  নীড়ে ফেরে  সে ...যেখানে  প্রেম  অপ্রেম  মিলেমিশে  জন্ম  দেয় বিশ্বাসের ..

সেই  অনন্ত  বিশ্বাস  থেকে  কতবার  পুনর্জন্ম  নিয়েছে  সে ..তোমাকে  ভালবাসবে  বলে

মালা  গেঁথে  চলে  বেদনার  একটা  একটা  করে  ফুল  ছিঁড়ে ...যেভাবে  রাত্রির  চারটে প্রহর  ছিঁড়ে

সূর্য  দিনের  মালা  গাঁথে ...তারপর  কোনো  এক  দিনান্তে  জ্যোত্স্নালোকে  ভোররাত্রির মিলনে  ভরে  ওঠে  অমৃতকুম্ভ ...